“Solo-Dad….Please Report to the Principal’s Office”

Intestinal Fortitude

If you’ve never heard that announcement with your own name inserted in the appropriate place, I can’t possibly describe the sudden sense of deep-freeze-cold that envelops your gastrointestinal tract.

I’ve heard it more than once in my life and it was with the same GI Freeze that I approached the Junior High’s administration offices to discuss my son’s absences late last week.

As I convey in my post about my frustration with LE’s other parent, I made the appointment with the Principal to discuss is absences.

Following Dr. Leah’s advice, I started with my strongest point and let the Principal respond.  I felt my strongest lead was, in fact, LE’s poor attendance.  Without playing the blame game, I demonstrated that his unexcused absences fell either on a Thursday (following his weekly Wednesday sleepover at her house) or on days when I was out of time.

After hearing my opening, he mentioned that after my email last week he’d reviewed the attendance record and came to the conclusion that had I not written him, he’s assumed it was a case of uninvolved parenting.

He’s Half Correct.

One parent is uninvolved in his education.  It’s unfortunate because she is, for the most part, a product of uninvolved parenting. Her dad left early in her life and wasn’t involved in her life very much.  Her mother spent her time serial dating and gambling.

LE’s mother didn’t go to college but did graduate from a post secondary program for working in the medical field so does know the value of education.

And just because I earned both a Bachelor’s and a Doctoral degree doesn’t make me a more involved parent; neither of my parents graduated from college and they were very involved in my education…sometimes more than I wished for. 

Still, the fact remains, she’s not making the effort required to get him to school most days after he’s spent the night.

Going Forward

One positive outcome the Principal offered was checking each Thursday on LE’s attendance. Should he be absent, he’ll place telephone her and state that LE needs to be in school.  He even mentioned the possibility of sending the Sheriff’s Office to her house to enforce school attendance policy.

I wasn’t sure about it and he said he’s done it before.  It may come to that as law enforcement is one public agency has respect for.

I feel progress was made on the issue from the perspective that the school and I now better partners in LE’s education. As I informed the Principal, I’ve developed good relationships with all LE’s teacher via email.  I’ve been impressed with their willingness to go out of their 8-3 day to help him succeed.