“LE’s really growing up, isn’t he?” 
A former colleague and mastermind buddy emailed me a week or so ago. She’d seen this video and commented on LE’s vertical growth, his deepening voice, and his overall physical maturity.
“Yes,” I countered in a reply…”but into what?”
The Metamorphosis of Attitude
Along with the metamorphosis of physical attributes that accompanies the big ‘P,’ teens experience a new set of attitudes. Encouraged by raging hormone fluxes, these attitudes are often uncontrollable at first.
It’s as if they discover their innate sense of power and ability to express themselves. Of course, how they choose to express their emotions is as individual as each emotion.
But with three teens to my parenting credit, this last trip through Teen-land might be the most challenging of all.
When it Comes to Parenting Teens, Experience Means Nothing
- Forget that I have helped co-parent three teens in the past ten years.
- Forget that each are highly functioning young adults.
- Forget that I’ve earned more degrees than 92.1% .of all Americans.
- Forget that I’ve been through this minefield and lived to tell the tale.
- Forget that I decided seven years ago to take this child and leave a household brimming with domestic violence in order to give him the chance he needed to live without fear.
It means nothing. At least where my innate teen-parenting skills are concerned.
Here’s An Example
It was 8:20a on the Sunday morning after Thanksgiving when I received the call from LE. He ‘demanded’ to know where I was.
“Buddy woke me up,” he says with emphasis on the ‘woke.’ “Where are you, anyway?”
He sounded like my father about 35 years ago.
“I’m down here at Deluxe Foods getting some coffee. I’ll be home in a few minutes.”
“OK, but Buddy was really barking, you know.”
Oh, OK. Let me drop what I’m doing to come home and silence the dog so you can continue to sleep into the afternoon!
That wasn’t really my response, but it did raise its hand in my consciousness seeking permission to express itself.
Back To Reality & to School
Of course not all days are like this. Since Christmas, and the advent of an X-Box 360, I’ve seen little of LE except at mealtimes. OK, I’m kidding. I seen when nature calls, too. 
He’s been off from school for three weeks and returns on Tuesday to the world where everyone acts like he does. In a way, I’ll be glad he back in school. But it’s also been a good Winter Break for us as a family.
Despite the X-Box factor, we’ve spent a good deal of time together. My employer shut down for the week after Christmas and LE and I spent it together.
And even if he’s turning into a teenage mutant ninja something, he’s still the best thing in my life. 
Have faith Bro!
When my daughter was 15 I thought she’d have a career as drug addict or Ho!
Love .. patience .. and lots of valium for me (kidding!) got us through those crazy times.
She is now 35, a way, way better mother than her own was, and the hardest working Gen-Xer I know .. oh and Head Concierge of a 5 Star Hotel (no degree, no college) ..
Trust your Intuition … LE is a great kid … love really does conquer all ..especially the love of a great Solo Dad!
Hugs, Double L
I know all too well how easy it can be to blame ourselves when our kids act out.
The teenage years are tough, worried about grades, girls, self-esteem, family life, and ‘what are you going to be when you grow up’ can make a teen lash out at those who are attempting to help with all that. I had three teens all at the same time and though they all went through stages… It has made them into well rounded young adults who now handle stress well.
And like LL said above, things have a way of working out.